I want to

I want to craft a letter
of infinite complexity
so that every strange
bizarre outlandish theory
I could muster would be
put to the test.

Yes, I want to pen a missive
of preposterous length
so that no reader except
the one who truly cared to read it
would be able to read until
the end.

In it, I want to hide a song
of unimaginable wonder
containing melody so stirring
no rational human being could
listen to it without being overwhelmed
by it's inimitable
harmonies.

dear God,

I stare into space, I
Feel like a sort of
swordsman on the
battlements above
the sea

I see the stars, green
blue and red, send radio
signals, waves,
a message of normalcy of
a status quo to
the ones who can read it
or hear it and know

am i that one? is
the message for me? to
read, naturally occuring and
seen to be seen but for what
or by who or why
when how and what these signals
they know something
i don't

they know something
maybe its why or
where
but its doubtful, but
even by their lack of
knowledge, they know that
they don't know

which is more than i do.


amen

It's May 12, and...

Again strange things are afoot. I love it, I would have it no other way. After seeing, firsthand the concept of coincidence repeatedly disproven in a way only visible to myself, I know things. Everything is fine. Everything is important. Life is interesting, it is fun, it is enjoyable, and all I need to do is react to the multitudes of blessings laid out before me. It's like a buffet of wonder. I'm in this, I think, for whatever the haul is. With help, of course. Always with help. No mind can conceive.

Good day to you all.

Exponential growth.

Sometimes you learn so much in a short time that time drags out. The more you learn in any moment, the longer the moment seems. I know now the difference between things I never could before. Fear as I have always known it is transformed into something more akin to... Something. Words take on new meanings, my life improves and changes.

More.

The following post will only be understood by the ones who know what it pertains to.

It seems we have different types of senses. This may seem like something you already know but it, like most things, goes deeper.

I have identified two different types of senses, which is, I suppose, actually more accurately described as "a distinction."

Anyway, your mind is set to work in a certain way, and when unexpected events perceived by the observer as events "of particular oddity" or "anomolous" happen, the mind is forced to open bizarre thought trains that may have to go boldly into some territory that is normally ignored. This effect is a sort of mental causal domain shear, one of my favorite explanations for things.

Anyhow, forcing these not oft used pathways to open creates an intense and volatile state of awareness within the mind that so produced them, then forgot them. This sensation is not altogether unpleasant, however, the result is generally perceived as "frustrating."

I digress.

Puzzlement, I have grown to accept, should be the general default mindset of anyone intent on figuring things out.

But, life is always... Anomolous, and sometimes, I would trade it all for just that next upsight.

I guess I'm an addict, in that respect. There's more to it, but I try not to think about ultra-abstract things all the time, and... Certain subjects are certainly well within that jurisdiction.

Say it with me, kids: "I try to survive spring."

Deny that seasons affect disposition. Do it.

Thats not what I want, I just... Life is strange always.


Always.

Weirdness comes due

I saw something today that, when I saw it, I realized that I had never seen before. Now, this is an idea that many people just dismiss as it happens, but the idea behind seeing something for The First Time is actually a rather important event in anyone's life.

Anyway, what I saw that was new was a S.W.A.T. van.

There is some instinct inside us that can discern what is natural from what is unnatural, and all we make is stuff that is unnatural.

I saw a sign today.

It read, "We are because God is."

This has flummoxed me. This statement, I found, lacks any sort of aperture for semantic deconstruction, and, to my unseasoned mind, is completely incomprehensible. The surface message is easily read, something along the lines of "If God hadn't created us, we would not be here." The subtext however, bears a strong, and I'm sure none-too-accidental resemblance to a popular saying by one Rene Descartes which stated "I think, therefore I am."

This statement, so I've been told, was the beginning of some sort of anti-church campaign, making Man the center of his own universe and somehow removing God from the equation.

I respectfully disagree. Because we were imbued, by our creator, with free will, or rather gave us the choice. Either way, our consciousness was not an accident. Without it, where would we be, and what relation could we possibly have with God? We think, therefore we are. God allowed us to choose the ability to think, giving us the power to be in relation to him.

Looked at in the correct light, Descartes' statement should be a founding point for the realization of the awesome magnitude of the Creator, and more importantly, represents the idea that we not only ARE because of the Magnet, but thr Magnet has something for us that is oft forgotten,

respect.

Wake up.. Wake up!

It's a bright big beautiful day.


Anyhow, Lazytown music aside, I just woke up here at around 11:30 and I didn't want to. I was trying to figure out why I didn't want to get up, seeing as lack of sleep would likely have little to do with it, I got enough, hours-wise, but I still didn't want to get up. I wasn't tired, it just seemed like I had unfinished business in the realm of the unconscious. I have been contemplating the idea that when you are asleep your body is unable to do anything else so your mind is freed up to use whatever energy it wants to accomplish whatever it is it's trying to do.

This theory would explain some things, like when you awaken and can almost feel important revelations slipping away as some of the energy that was being used toward the mental project is diverted for such things as vision and limb movement.

When we are asleep, our brains do not need to process any information whatsoever, and is free to use all available resources to deal in worlds incorporeal. When our other senses reactivate, well... Our subconscious goes from trying to puzzle out the reports that the other senses have been providing them with throughout their active time and must divert power to allow the process of taking in new ones.

Perhaps this is why meditation is so important to understanding things. In meditation, the goal is to stop the intake of new information so that we can allow the brain to catch up on the information it has already received. Hmm, in this way, sleeping is a sort of meditation.

Well, gotta go drink some milk and intake some information.

More from the front

Sometimes I leave notes for future me to find. I am heartened by these, as they indicate I am on the right track. For instance this note right now, even though it is, at this point, a nigh-empty shell with a hint of meaning, will one day become something new and more powerful. It is a great way of keeping the sense of purpose in ones life. I blame the causal domain shear that happens as time progresses... A strange way to measure time by about any standard. If we did not observe time, would it exist? Does it exist now? We can measure the effects of time, but its definition seems to be... Tenuous? Well, seeing as it's all relative anyway.

Oh, look at that, I found the apostrophe. BEHOLD. MY punctuational arsenal has been reassembled.

I do believe that Troi said it best when she said
"This is no time to argue about time; we don't have the time."

Now, that is what you call a mind bender of a saying... Not that there are a great shortage of those. I guess it all just depends on who takes the time to think about it.

Dammit, that's the point, isn't it?

Weirdness always abides.

It is a widely believed fact that the world is home to some manner of resident weirdness. People call it different things, and it is assigned different meanings, thusly is observed under different mental condition. It would be interesting to know what sort of changes are affected upon our world pertaining solely to the subconscious, or conscious semantic assignment we use to shape our study of our observations.

It would be worth it to know, as generally upsights are fleeting and hard to hold on to, if not infrequent. The power in things is derived from the reason for it. In the same way that one mans chopstick is another mans stir stick. (Also, please forgive my erratic punctuation as I am recording this via a mobile device.)

I guess its not that I have enough time to just sit around and think up crazy nonsense, its just how I choose to spend it. If it does turn out to be a pointless endeavour (which I do not believe to be the case) then eh, no more pointless than watching endless tv or playing excessive video games.

One of my favorite activities is to try to conjecture the reason why stuff is the way it is. Knowing, as They used to say, is half the battle. Its also a Nicholas Cage movie about, like, the end of the world or something. Weird connection?